4:24 Left In The Second Period

The time in Monday's win over the Pack that Theismann started gushing about the Super Bowl ring he won with the Redskins. I think it's a new record. How about a round of applaase for ol' Joe for waiting so long into a game to start talking about his old career? And, to think, he might've even lasted longer if Tony Kornhole hadn't egged him on!

Speaking of which, you know what really grinds my gears?!?

What was that tripe Kornhole was spewing about "revisionist history" when Tirico was talking about how McNabb's and the team's production went down due to his injuries last year? Kornhole comes back with something to the effect of, yeah, that's the revisionist history everybody's saying these days, that it wasn't the TO debacle that caused the team's demise last year, it was McNabb's injuries. Uh, ya think?

Let's see, McNabb has had every kind of adversity thrown at him during his NFL career (boo'd on draft day, Rush Limbaugh comments, etc.) and overcame or played out of all of them. Right, Tony. Some bitchy, whining, everybody's-against-me, everything-I-evah-did-wrong-is-because-that-kid-spit-in mah-mouth-on-da-schoolbus-dat-one-time primadonna, emotionally-handicapped, OD'ing-cos-his-girlfriend-dumped-him-uh-I-mean-reaction-to-mah-supplements punk-ass wide receiver, is really the reason for the team's demise --- and not the fact that it's star quarterback and most vital team member suffered a bruised sternum in Week 1, and tried to play through an excruciatingly painful sports hernia that eventually ended his season in week 9 but even before that limited his primary strength (mobility) as well as his range, accuracy, timing, etc, etc. --- was the main reason for the team's demise? You are on crack, Tony. Seriously. How's that for "revisionism"?

And I think all of us are just a little worn out --- and it's only week 4, people! --- by your little snark schtick. They tried it with Dennis Miller, and he bombed. but at least he was creative, Tony. The only thing creative on you is how you manage to get that whiq combed over and molded into the shape of the Shoney's Big bBy coif. Seriously, dude, you haev a whole week to write your "jokes," and I use that term loosely for the sake of argument...

Here's to the day when Theismann finally comes out of the alcohol and too-many-blows-to-the-head-induced, reminsicent fog he's always in, realizes that you're egging him on a bit too much, and throws you out of the booth and onto the stands below, where you will be immediately chewed into cud by rabid Eagles fans, then tossed onto the field, stopping play only long enough for Andy Reid to pick a play on his chart before incurring another delay of game penalty.